New weight loss goals

So, I don't know that I've really mentioned this this year, but I did make some resolutions. I resolved to jog once a week, and while I may have told Hubby about that one, I didn't mention the one I was secretly trying to do: cut down to one dessert a day. I know for some people (probably a lot) they only have dessert once a week. I seem to replace my meals with sweets when I have the opportunity, and I wanted to try to change that. So for the last month, I have struggled and tried, and it turns out that making those resolutions has resulted in the opposite effect. I haven't jogged once since the new year started, and I find myself eating sweets multiple times a day. The sweets thing actually worked for a few days. And then it was all over in the blink of an eye because I just WANT sweets. By 'I', I mean my body. And while I used to pride myself of my self-control, it's kind of gone to shit in recent years. So it's very difficult to deny myself something that I have the power and means to give.
Phew. I just worked out with Hubby for nearly an hour. We've decided that he'll be my 'personal trainer' to keep me going in the gym twice a week. I'm also going to ask my doctor about any diet aids he might recommend and any precautions I should take considering my hypothyroidism. Did you know if the dosage of your medicine is off, it can cause you to sleep a lot more, wake up tired, and have insomnia? It can also cause weight shifts, loss of mental-awareness and other not cool things. It's possible that the medicine's dosage has been off for a while, causing my body to think it needs more weight than it does. Honestly, my belly is so big now it's getting in the way of me doing stuff. If I ride a bike, my legs constantly bump my belly!! That's too big for me!! So I'm setting a goal. I want to lose two pounds a week. And I want to lose 30 pounds by our anniversary. If I do, I will be able to go and get glamour photos done again (since that was an incredible experience, but a little expensive so I don't want to do it more than once a year). If I don't, then I won't. Honestly, at my current weight and size, I wouldn't want to get them done anyway. My ideal weight is 180. I am about 50 pounds from that. ;___; But with Hubby's help, I think I can do it.
See, the thing about helping is this: I HATE being told no. I really dislike when someone says 'Uh, Runa, are you sure you should be eating that/doing that/etc.' and my obstinate streak rears its head. Even if I have to privately admit you're right, I shouldn't, Outwardly I have to bull forward and take it on, even if I might have changed my mind otherwise. I don't like it, I know it's just stupidly stubborn, but I've been fighting it for the last two years and haven't won yet, so I think it's safe to say I won't suddenly be okay when someone tells me I can't have something.
So back to helping: The most effective (by far) weight loss help I got was my host mom preparing the meals and encouraging me to bike places. Since Hubby isn't suddenly going to be a master chef that can cook low calorie yet filling meals, and since Austin isn't suddenly going to be a safe city for bikers to roam at will, we have to figure out other methods.
I believe I'm going to try to keep a food journal. It's rather effective at minimizing the food I eat because I simply don't want to admit to eating 10 cookies and two milk shakes in a day (that's an exaggeration) and my honesty compels me to be clear. I also think I will weigh myself and keep track of it in Excel each day so I can make graphs and notes for extenuating circumstances, or extraordinary results. These both come rather close to shaming methods, but I hope I can look at my weight and food choices with an eye toward learning and educating, not just being ashamed of myself constantly.
Since we just came back from the gym, I think I should start today. The only thing is, I've only had one meal today, and I'm getting hungry, so if I weigh and note food now, it won't be as accurate. If I just set a time each day to weigh myself, I think I can stick to it more. I think I'll choose midnight. Simply because I should be done with eating and trying to get to bed close to that time anyway, and this encourages it.
Speaking of sleeping, my insomnia is insane. I was up til past 7:20 this morning trying to get to sleep, and then woke up around 11:30 this morning because the people above us were moving stuff around, sliding around, or something that was repetitive, nonsexual, and extremely annoying. I was tired and angry enough that I actually grabbed our old swiffer and banged it on the ceiling. They did it twice more and then stopped. I always appreciate those that realize they're being asses and seek to correct their behavior.

I watched the grammys while working out, and was nearly brought to tears by the marriage ceremonies performed. I wonder if Queen Latifah is actually certified by the State of California to preside over marriages though... I can't find a video of it, it only happened an hour or so ago. Maybe I can find one later, or you can find one yourselves, but it was beautiful. Here's some more details about it. http://www.digitalspy.com/music/news/a546691/grammys-2014-madonna-macklemore-performance-to-include-live-weddings.html

Love ya'll!!