I got the urge to call my mom on my way to pick up Hubby from his tutoring. When I finally got there, I called and asked if anything new had happened. She informed me that a few minutes before, Cin had called and talked to Kris! My sister is SAFE! ....For now. I fully intend to beat her bloody when I get the chance. Kris is currently on her way to go get Cin, and I will hopefully have a nice long talk with her today or tomorrow.
I am so very relieved she's alright. And thank you all for your support, I really really appreciate it. At least, I assume she's alright since she was able to yell at Kris on the phone.
I spoke with Kris about an hour ago. She called the police to meet her where she was picking Cin up, so she didn't get that many details from her, but here's what she did get: A guy DID try to kill Cin. All Cin knows is that there was a lot of pain on her neck, and then she couldn't see, and she couldn't move, but she could hear things going on around her. They dumped her in the woods, and she woke up two days ago and just got out of the woods today.
Kris didn't see any marks on Cin's neck. Honestly, I want a damn lie detector test because it sounds crazy. But on the other hand, she was certainly covered in dirt and looked jaded as fuck in her inmate photo. Do you realize she now has 5 mugshots in the record? And there's a steady progression from 'youthful misdemeanor' to 'fuck you and you and you. you don't know shit bout me. you don't know my life' ....honestly, I find it somewhat amusing and heartbreaking at the same time.
I don't know what to do about her. On the one hand, I want to hurt her as much as she hurt me when I thought she'd died. On the other hand, I want to hug her and cry and beg her to never do something like that again.
Hubby really dislikes her, and he wants us to lay down the law about how she can't tell Mia things (especially anything personal like what she's just gone through). I.... feel like that could further fracture her, if we approach it the way he wants to.
I don't know if I posted this, but MJ asked me if her mom was a good person, before they had the talk where Cin told MJ she was going to jail. I told her that deep down, I KNOW she's a good person, but over time, she's built up this crust of bad, and that's why I always have to be so careful with her mom. Well after this experience, I feel that her 'crust of bad' is turning as hard as obsidian and will utterly bury or decimate the goodness left in her. I'm worried about her, but I'm equally worried the effect she's going to have on MJ.
Today MJ was upset that Hubby didn't turn back to help her when she dropped her clothes (he didn't know she'd dropped them) and said she expected better from her father.....figure. There was a slight pause between father and figure that made me smile. He explained he didn't know, and he was worried that she felt he didn't love her and asked me to check in on the situation. When I did, MJ was very serious about 'I understand now. I didn't at the time, but I know he would have helped if he'd known.'
I think I'm just gonna add music now. Teehee.
MJ shocked me when she explained to me that this song was about a stripper:
Surprisingly, this kinda reflects my feelings for my sister(minus the romantic connotations of course. ewww):
This video is CRAZY. I wasn't gonna share it because I wasn't interested in the song itself, but it's too weird not to. Also, I totally thought they were nude at first. Thank goodness that's not true.
Sunday, March 29, 2015
Thursday, March 26, 2015
This month sucks balls. Hard.
So everyone knows by now that my grandma passed on early in March. Then, I was unable to get a full week off during my birthday (it'll be this monday) because we're understaffed.
This however, this tops the cake. I just got off the phone with my family. My sister has been missing since Monday. Kris saw her Sunday when she came in to Kris's job asking for some food (which of course Kris bought her). Then she left with some unknown guy, and the next day or Tuesday (no one's very clear) texts were sent out from her phone from someone saying 'I killed the bitch. You may find her body someday, but you ain't never gonna find me. Bitch never knew how to keep her mouth shut.' Or something to that effect. The police are searching for her right now, and they've added another detective to the case. Her facebook was taken down by somebody. No idea who. I wasn't told until just now that my sister, the mother of my child, is missing. And likely dead, if that message is true.
There's really two options here: Either it's true, and I just lost my sister. MJ just lost her mom. And we don't even know who or why they did it.
Or.
Cin typed that out herself for some reason. Possible reasons for this could be: trying to throw off the law (she's wanted in two counties right now), or trying to see if we care. Either way, if she's faking it, I will personally beat her bloody, and then cry myself to sleep in relief. I'm so scared, I have no idea what to tell MJ (not that I'm telling her shit before we have more information than some fucked up texts from some nobody), and I am SO CONFLICTED.
On the one hand, I hope to god (who I don't even believe in, I'm so stressed) she IS faking it. Because at least I have my sister still in this world, and MJ won't lose her mind. And yeah, there's lots of possible reasons she may have thought this was a good idea for her to try.
But on the other hand, she's been in some deep ass shit for a while now, crazy on drugs, and she really hasn't ever been able to keep her mouth shut. If anything would drive someone to killing her, that would totally be the number one reason. And I just can't imagine my sister gone.
A large part of me doesn't believe this, for a very simple yet fucked up reason: I dreamt about this on Tuesday. I woke up pissed as hell (as hubby can attest) and essentially went the whole day feeling angry. Of course I dismissed that dream, and if it really happened (and what happened in it was very.... anger inducing. Highlights: Car, violence, little house/shack in some woods, really gross floor and two guys) I may not fully recover.
A very small, detestable part of me wonders if we'd be able to adopt MJ if it were true. If that might help, or if that might make it worse for her.
A medium part of me wants to become hysterical and run off to NC to look for her, never mind that I haven't any idea where she might be, or who she might be in contact with.
No one knows what's going on. We're all freaking out, and yet we're all also unsure if this is a valid threat. I'm so worried my heartburn started up again, even after taking my medicine.
....this is mostly so all of you know what's going on, but if any of you happen to want to keep an eye out for her, please let me know and I'll send you a pic. Thanks,
This however, this tops the cake. I just got off the phone with my family. My sister has been missing since Monday. Kris saw her Sunday when she came in to Kris's job asking for some food (which of course Kris bought her). Then she left with some unknown guy, and the next day or Tuesday (no one's very clear) texts were sent out from her phone from someone saying 'I killed the bitch. You may find her body someday, but you ain't never gonna find me. Bitch never knew how to keep her mouth shut.' Or something to that effect. The police are searching for her right now, and they've added another detective to the case. Her facebook was taken down by somebody. No idea who. I wasn't told until just now that my sister, the mother of my child, is missing. And likely dead, if that message is true.
There's really two options here: Either it's true, and I just lost my sister. MJ just lost her mom. And we don't even know who or why they did it.
Or.
Cin typed that out herself for some reason. Possible reasons for this could be: trying to throw off the law (she's wanted in two counties right now), or trying to see if we care. Either way, if she's faking it, I will personally beat her bloody, and then cry myself to sleep in relief. I'm so scared, I have no idea what to tell MJ (not that I'm telling her shit before we have more information than some fucked up texts from some nobody), and I am SO CONFLICTED.
On the one hand, I hope to god (who I don't even believe in, I'm so stressed) she IS faking it. Because at least I have my sister still in this world, and MJ won't lose her mind. And yeah, there's lots of possible reasons she may have thought this was a good idea for her to try.
But on the other hand, she's been in some deep ass shit for a while now, crazy on drugs, and she really hasn't ever been able to keep her mouth shut. If anything would drive someone to killing her, that would totally be the number one reason. And I just can't imagine my sister gone.
A large part of me doesn't believe this, for a very simple yet fucked up reason: I dreamt about this on Tuesday. I woke up pissed as hell (as hubby can attest) and essentially went the whole day feeling angry. Of course I dismissed that dream, and if it really happened (and what happened in it was very.... anger inducing. Highlights: Car, violence, little house/shack in some woods, really gross floor and two guys) I may not fully recover.
A very small, detestable part of me wonders if we'd be able to adopt MJ if it were true. If that might help, or if that might make it worse for her.
A medium part of me wants to become hysterical and run off to NC to look for her, never mind that I haven't any idea where she might be, or who she might be in contact with.
No one knows what's going on. We're all freaking out, and yet we're all also unsure if this is a valid threat. I'm so worried my heartburn started up again, even after taking my medicine.
....this is mostly so all of you know what's going on, but if any of you happen to want to keep an eye out for her, please let me know and I'll send you a pic. Thanks,
Friday, March 20, 2015
Anyone know what a domain name is?
I just got the option to make a domain name for my blog, but I thought it already had one.... Oh well.
So first off: Sorry for leaving the brunt of the blogging to Hubbykins. In my defense, I love reading/hearing his opinion on everything that happens, and a really effective way to get to hear that is if I ask him to be the one to blog about significant life events. Another reason is that I'm simply lazy, especially when I remember that it takes me a good 30-60 minutes to blog because I always include far more detail than anyone ever asked for.
I like this song, it makes me wanna dance with Hubby:
Now, second on the life events scale: Yes, my grandmother died two weeks ago, and we managed to make it to her funeral. It left all of us tired and possibly sick. Hubby and MJ especially have this rather terrible sounding cough, and I wish we could get them in to the doctor. I was going to take MJ today, but when I woke up, it was like I'd never slept, and I just couldn't get up. Turns out MJ felt the same way. It's 5 o clock and she's STILL laying in bed. I'm not complaining, I just hope she'll be able to sleep tonight. I may give her nyquil, cause I know she wakes up every time she coughs like that.
Yesterday we had two major events. The first event, was that I went to an interview, did a test run of massage, and 'failed the audition' as it were. I wasn't customer-ready, so they weren't prepared to hire me at this time. They did admit I have amazing technique, but my table massage is clumsy and needs some practice. I apparently give amazing pressure, so I can rest easy on that score at least. When listening to the voicemail (we were in a movie), MJ and Hubby wouldnt let me walk away to listen and they werent able to keep quiet enough for me to hear it, so I got really angry because I had to listen to my inadequacy twice. It wasn't quite fair of me to expect them to read my mind, and I didn't give them warning that I needed quiet, so it's my own fault.
My feelings on this: I feel mortified that I was found lacking, but very relieved that I wouldn't be working 3 extra days a week, as they wanted me to for a piddling 20 dollars an hour. Isn't it funny how 20 an hour to me is almost insulting, while to most people that would be an awesome amount? The fact of it is that I should be able to make 60 dollars an hour easily, if I just groomed my own clientele. But I'm terminally shy and unwilling to do that if I'm going to move (which we've been pretty adamant to do eventually), so I accept the far lower pay of 20-40 dollars an hour.
I like the dance moves. They're so funny and yet suitable for Lady Gaga:
The other major event we had yesterday was: FAMILY DAY!!! We haven't had one in a while, and since Hubby had the day off, and I had the day off, and MJ is on spring break, we (meaning me) decided to. We dropped the car off to get the oil changed and tires rotated (It cost nearly $100!! Is that expensive to anyone else???) and went to eat breakfast at the best pancake place in town. I like their oatmeal because it comes with brown sugar and raisins, and MJ liked their breakfast tacos, especially when she was able to substitute the egg with sausage (cause she's allergic to egg).
After that we walked to Half Price Books where we set MJ up with her work. I bought an interesting review book for what every 5th grader is expected to learn (and the 6th grade one for next year/summer) in Math, Language Arts and Reading. And her composition book in addition to that (we've decreased it to one full page a day instead of two). She does two pages of math (and complains non-stop too), and four pages of the L.A. and Reading (each). We figure this is a great way to cement the lessons she learns at school in her mind so she's ready and able to get better grades. She doesn't seem to be naturally book-smart, so we'll just have to help her put in the effort instead. She's been doing pretty well. While Hubby helped her with the math portion (it took her two hours because she didn't wanna do it and didn't put in a lot of effort), I read a book. Then I graded her LA and Reading when she finished those. She doesn't just have to do them, she has to get 70% or higher on each page in order to 'pass' it.
They called to let us know our car was done, so we walked back, and then stopped by the house to get the address of the spa I was interviewing at (meant to do it earlier but forgot). Then on the way, they called to ask if we could delay it til 2 instead of 1 30. I agreed, and we went to the library right next door to it to kill time. We tried to find The Magicians that was recommended, but they didn't have it. I've placed some holds for a large-print copy for me later, so maybe I'll read it next week or something.
It got close to 2, so I cut my nails, filed them, and walked over.
I asked to use the restroom to wash my hands, and she showed me the way, then gave me a tour and we talked about what the expectations for working there would be like. They have a LOT of interesting options, and I'm tempted to try them myself, especially the couples massage. Then she explained I would be working on a LMT employee for about 30 minutes, and when she got free, we got started.
The massage went well, I'm pretty satisfied with how much I was able to do that limited time, and I think I hit most major points that a therapist would need worked on. We talked a bit while I worked about the spa and expectations and realities of working for them. I do admit I felt a little out of practice and wished I'd taken Hubby up on his offer to let me work on him the night before. I just didn't imagine I was so out of practice.
When I finished the lady had me try on a shirt to see if it would 'work ready' for tomorrow, and it fit alright. I was excited to hear they had a therapist my size, because I feel that LMTs my size are rather rare, and so I feel at a disadvantage being so large. It was good to hear that they didn't discriminate against size, so I left in a good mood, though I was shaking I was so hungry.
So I found the family, demanded sustenance, and we went to a Burger Cafe we'd been eyeing but never had a reason to be near when dinner time cropped up. It was pretty good, but oily and a little disappointing. The menu was also hard to interpret and difficult to find something that appealed to all of us.
From there we went (early) to the movie Strange Magic. I swear, there was definitely more singing than speaking in that whole movie. It was HILARIOUS but weird. I liked all the new adaptations to current (and old school) music, but I'm getting a little tired of the villian and hero switching. As MJ said, you could see everything coming a mile away. I wish they'd had different voice actors for Bog and Ronald though. The voices just weren't sexy enough to appeal, and their singing was sometimes atrocious.
I checked my voicemail after the movie, got pissed off, and made Hubby mad because I was mad and snapped at him. On our way home, I apologized, and we decided to go to the arcade before we headed home. The first game we played was DDR (MJ and I) and I roundly beat her. I actually got a better score than I've had in years, and though my leg was trembling after, I was really happy. Then we (MJ and I) played Guitar Hero, where *I* was soundly beaten (had no idea what I was doing wrong, but it might have had something to do with it being on 'lefty' mode for me). Then we went to play upstairs but we should have gone to Air Hockey. Thinking back, it was really MJ and I dragging Hubby around doing what we wanted. We didn't even get to play Air Hockey, which is what Hubby always looks forward to when we go because when we went back to play it, there was a huge crowd and we couldn't even really get close. Well, anyway, MJ and I had fun, though MJ was ready to cry when I said we were out of tokens and had to leave. She was very dissatisfied with the number of tokens we'd collected (104) and at first didn't want any prizes, but I managed to cajole her into wanting a few things (like a duck caller and a fan with a moustache and some candy).
Then we went home, and I think we all ate our own things before going to bed.
I think that's it, and once again I've written a ridiculous amount. Sorry about that....
These are still some of my favorite songs:
So first off: Sorry for leaving the brunt of the blogging to Hubbykins. In my defense, I love reading/hearing his opinion on everything that happens, and a really effective way to get to hear that is if I ask him to be the one to blog about significant life events. Another reason is that I'm simply lazy, especially when I remember that it takes me a good 30-60 minutes to blog because I always include far more detail than anyone ever asked for.
I like this song, it makes me wanna dance with Hubby:
Now, second on the life events scale: Yes, my grandmother died two weeks ago, and we managed to make it to her funeral. It left all of us tired and possibly sick. Hubby and MJ especially have this rather terrible sounding cough, and I wish we could get them in to the doctor. I was going to take MJ today, but when I woke up, it was like I'd never slept, and I just couldn't get up. Turns out MJ felt the same way. It's 5 o clock and she's STILL laying in bed. I'm not complaining, I just hope she'll be able to sleep tonight. I may give her nyquil, cause I know she wakes up every time she coughs like that.
Yesterday we had two major events. The first event, was that I went to an interview, did a test run of massage, and 'failed the audition' as it were. I wasn't customer-ready, so they weren't prepared to hire me at this time. They did admit I have amazing technique, but my table massage is clumsy and needs some practice. I apparently give amazing pressure, so I can rest easy on that score at least. When listening to the voicemail (we were in a movie), MJ and Hubby wouldnt let me walk away to listen and they werent able to keep quiet enough for me to hear it, so I got really angry because I had to listen to my inadequacy twice. It wasn't quite fair of me to expect them to read my mind, and I didn't give them warning that I needed quiet, so it's my own fault.
My feelings on this: I feel mortified that I was found lacking, but very relieved that I wouldn't be working 3 extra days a week, as they wanted me to for a piddling 20 dollars an hour. Isn't it funny how 20 an hour to me is almost insulting, while to most people that would be an awesome amount? The fact of it is that I should be able to make 60 dollars an hour easily, if I just groomed my own clientele. But I'm terminally shy and unwilling to do that if I'm going to move (which we've been pretty adamant to do eventually), so I accept the far lower pay of 20-40 dollars an hour.
I like the dance moves. They're so funny and yet suitable for Lady Gaga:
The other major event we had yesterday was: FAMILY DAY!!! We haven't had one in a while, and since Hubby had the day off, and I had the day off, and MJ is on spring break, we (meaning me) decided to. We dropped the car off to get the oil changed and tires rotated (It cost nearly $100!! Is that expensive to anyone else???) and went to eat breakfast at the best pancake place in town. I like their oatmeal because it comes with brown sugar and raisins, and MJ liked their breakfast tacos, especially when she was able to substitute the egg with sausage (cause she's allergic to egg).
After that we walked to Half Price Books where we set MJ up with her work. I bought an interesting review book for what every 5th grader is expected to learn (and the 6th grade one for next year/summer) in Math, Language Arts and Reading. And her composition book in addition to that (we've decreased it to one full page a day instead of two). She does two pages of math (and complains non-stop too), and four pages of the L.A. and Reading (each). We figure this is a great way to cement the lessons she learns at school in her mind so she's ready and able to get better grades. She doesn't seem to be naturally book-smart, so we'll just have to help her put in the effort instead. She's been doing pretty well. While Hubby helped her with the math portion (it took her two hours because she didn't wanna do it and didn't put in a lot of effort), I read a book. Then I graded her LA and Reading when she finished those. She doesn't just have to do them, she has to get 70% or higher on each page in order to 'pass' it.
They called to let us know our car was done, so we walked back, and then stopped by the house to get the address of the spa I was interviewing at (meant to do it earlier but forgot). Then on the way, they called to ask if we could delay it til 2 instead of 1 30. I agreed, and we went to the library right next door to it to kill time. We tried to find The Magicians that was recommended, but they didn't have it. I've placed some holds for a large-print copy for me later, so maybe I'll read it next week or something.
It got close to 2, so I cut my nails, filed them, and walked over.
I asked to use the restroom to wash my hands, and she showed me the way, then gave me a tour and we talked about what the expectations for working there would be like. They have a LOT of interesting options, and I'm tempted to try them myself, especially the couples massage. Then she explained I would be working on a LMT employee for about 30 minutes, and when she got free, we got started.
The massage went well, I'm pretty satisfied with how much I was able to do that limited time, and I think I hit most major points that a therapist would need worked on. We talked a bit while I worked about the spa and expectations and realities of working for them. I do admit I felt a little out of practice and wished I'd taken Hubby up on his offer to let me work on him the night before. I just didn't imagine I was so out of practice.
When I finished the lady had me try on a shirt to see if it would 'work ready' for tomorrow, and it fit alright. I was excited to hear they had a therapist my size, because I feel that LMTs my size are rather rare, and so I feel at a disadvantage being so large. It was good to hear that they didn't discriminate against size, so I left in a good mood, though I was shaking I was so hungry.
So I found the family, demanded sustenance, and we went to a Burger Cafe we'd been eyeing but never had a reason to be near when dinner time cropped up. It was pretty good, but oily and a little disappointing. The menu was also hard to interpret and difficult to find something that appealed to all of us.
From there we went (early) to the movie Strange Magic. I swear, there was definitely more singing than speaking in that whole movie. It was HILARIOUS but weird. I liked all the new adaptations to current (and old school) music, but I'm getting a little tired of the villian and hero switching. As MJ said, you could see everything coming a mile away. I wish they'd had different voice actors for Bog and Ronald though. The voices just weren't sexy enough to appeal, and their singing was sometimes atrocious.
I checked my voicemail after the movie, got pissed off, and made Hubby mad because I was mad and snapped at him. On our way home, I apologized, and we decided to go to the arcade before we headed home. The first game we played was DDR (MJ and I) and I roundly beat her. I actually got a better score than I've had in years, and though my leg was trembling after, I was really happy. Then we (MJ and I) played Guitar Hero, where *I* was soundly beaten (had no idea what I was doing wrong, but it might have had something to do with it being on 'lefty' mode for me). Then we went to play upstairs but we should have gone to Air Hockey. Thinking back, it was really MJ and I dragging Hubby around doing what we wanted. We didn't even get to play Air Hockey, which is what Hubby always looks forward to when we go because when we went back to play it, there was a huge crowd and we couldn't even really get close. Well, anyway, MJ and I had fun, though MJ was ready to cry when I said we were out of tokens and had to leave. She was very dissatisfied with the number of tokens we'd collected (104) and at first didn't want any prizes, but I managed to cajole her into wanting a few things (like a duck caller and a fan with a moustache and some candy).
Then we went home, and I think we all ate our own things before going to bed.
I think that's it, and once again I've written a ridiculous amount. Sorry about that....
These are still some of my favorite songs:
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Arkansas, arkansas, I just love old arkansas
I've been thinking I should blog for the last week or so, and have finally gotten around to it! There's been several topics I've been thinking of writing about, but ultimately, it's just what's currently on my mind, so maybe I'll get back to the other ones.
Every time I hear 'Arkansas' I think of that play (I think it's Tom Sawyer) where a boy goes skipping around singing the title of this post. So, the deal with Arkansas is that I had a client today that's moving there, and the price for buying a house was pretty cheap, and it was the 5th state with lowest cost of living, and in 2014 it was found to be the most affordable state to live in.
Frankly, we need affordable right now.
I was told it has four distinct seasons, and the highest recorded temperature ever is only 115 degrees F. You may be like 'WTF?! THATS HOT' but EVERY year here in Austin, it's reached above 100 degrees, if not 110. The highest average I found for AR is only 93 degrees in comparison. That's manageable, after this hell-hole. I don't think I can take another Austin summer, to be honest.
It also is supposed to snow occasionally, but looking at their temps, it doesn't actually look like it does that much. It says it's infrequent, but does occasionally happen in the northern part. I'd like to move to the North Eastern area, but haven't had much luck finding places that are flush with massage therapist jobs. On the one hand, that means I could be able to strike gold in an area with little competition, but on the other hand, I would have to start out without any help, and I don't feel prepared to do that.
The minus side is that they require 25 hours of CE for LMTS. Tennessee by comparison only requires 18 (And TX requires a mere 12). A certain friend of ours also recommends TN over AR, but also recommends NC over both by a long shot.
Frankly, I don't want to return to NC until my sister either straightens up, or gets hit with the consequences and is out of our hair. She is being demanding, obstinate, and is quite happy to call me a control freak. She feels it's her place to take over being a mom again, and completely dismisses any work we put into raising MJ, while at the same time giving lip service to us about doing her such a favor. I don't want to deal with her, because I feel it could harm our sister-relationship permanently. I don't want to lose my sister, especially if I'm gonna have to deal with her every month for the next 7 years. And I will, unless we reopen the court case. *sigh*
The main frustration I'm running into right now is that most of the job openings that are online do not offer a price, and merely says they'll discuss it at the interview, if its mentioned at all.
Another reason we're leaning towards TN over Arkansas (Even though for some insane reason I'm wanting AR a lot) is that they actually have branches of Hubby's job that he could possibly transfer to.
We found a super cute house I would love to rent, with an affordable price and all the bedrooms we'd need for the next few years. It even has a dryer and washer and room for me to give massage from home.
I keep getting side-tracked looking at these places. Anyway, Hubby also wants to move, preferably near to the East Coast. He doesn't want AR because he's never seen a job posting for his field in AR, and I can't really argue with that. I think that means we're going to be making the effort to move this summer before we begin to hate everything about our current home.
Hm. Looking at Memphis, it's the largest city in Tennessee with it's population, but it's only 1/3 the population as Austin, which I could actually cry in relief over. Austin is just too big and crowded for me to be happy here much longer (if you could call what we've been up to now as happy).
Ugh, anyway, we're heading to bed (we've been staying up much too late much too often). Here's some music I find interesting/disturbing:
I couldn't stop watching this video. It's hilarious (and sexist):
As for this one, I liked it until the radio said it was from 50 Shades. I haven't read or watched it, but if its anything like some of the author's unpublished works (I've had the misfortune to read) then I'll pass. Her other works are pretty much: Excessive controlling behavior, no signs of the female actually having any say in anything, and not nearly enough joint decisions to feel like a love story, more like a rape story where the victim learns to like it.
Every time I hear 'Arkansas' I think of that play (I think it's Tom Sawyer) where a boy goes skipping around singing the title of this post. So, the deal with Arkansas is that I had a client today that's moving there, and the price for buying a house was pretty cheap, and it was the 5th state with lowest cost of living, and in 2014 it was found to be the most affordable state to live in.
Frankly, we need affordable right now.
I was told it has four distinct seasons, and the highest recorded temperature ever is only 115 degrees F. You may be like 'WTF?! THATS HOT' but EVERY year here in Austin, it's reached above 100 degrees, if not 110. The highest average I found for AR is only 93 degrees in comparison. That's manageable, after this hell-hole. I don't think I can take another Austin summer, to be honest.
It also is supposed to snow occasionally, but looking at their temps, it doesn't actually look like it does that much. It says it's infrequent, but does occasionally happen in the northern part. I'd like to move to the North Eastern area, but haven't had much luck finding places that are flush with massage therapist jobs. On the one hand, that means I could be able to strike gold in an area with little competition, but on the other hand, I would have to start out without any help, and I don't feel prepared to do that.
The minus side is that they require 25 hours of CE for LMTS. Tennessee by comparison only requires 18 (And TX requires a mere 12). A certain friend of ours also recommends TN over AR, but also recommends NC over both by a long shot.
Frankly, I don't want to return to NC until my sister either straightens up, or gets hit with the consequences and is out of our hair. She is being demanding, obstinate, and is quite happy to call me a control freak. She feels it's her place to take over being a mom again, and completely dismisses any work we put into raising MJ, while at the same time giving lip service to us about doing her such a favor. I don't want to deal with her, because I feel it could harm our sister-relationship permanently. I don't want to lose my sister, especially if I'm gonna have to deal with her every month for the next 7 years. And I will, unless we reopen the court case. *sigh*
The main frustration I'm running into right now is that most of the job openings that are online do not offer a price, and merely says they'll discuss it at the interview, if its mentioned at all.
Another reason we're leaning towards TN over Arkansas (Even though for some insane reason I'm wanting AR a lot) is that they actually have branches of Hubby's job that he could possibly transfer to.
We found a super cute house I would love to rent, with an affordable price and all the bedrooms we'd need for the next few years. It even has a dryer and washer and room for me to give massage from home.
I keep getting side-tracked looking at these places. Anyway, Hubby also wants to move, preferably near to the East Coast. He doesn't want AR because he's never seen a job posting for his field in AR, and I can't really argue with that. I think that means we're going to be making the effort to move this summer before we begin to hate everything about our current home.
Hm. Looking at Memphis, it's the largest city in Tennessee with it's population, but it's only 1/3 the population as Austin, which I could actually cry in relief over. Austin is just too big and crowded for me to be happy here much longer (if you could call what we've been up to now as happy).
Ugh, anyway, we're heading to bed (we've been staying up much too late much too often). Here's some music I find interesting/disturbing:
I couldn't stop watching this video. It's hilarious (and sexist):
As for this one, I liked it until the radio said it was from 50 Shades. I haven't read or watched it, but if its anything like some of the author's unpublished works (I've had the misfortune to read) then I'll pass. Her other works are pretty much: Excessive controlling behavior, no signs of the female actually having any say in anything, and not nearly enough joint decisions to feel like a love story, more like a rape story where the victim learns to like it.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Why I shouldn't drink iced coffee/frappes/McDonald's
This is just a list to remind myself why it's not worth buying. I hope you enjoy it and feel free to add comments on it!
~It causes the top of my mouth to hurt, and be sensitive and get hard (just plain painful)
~Its expensive
~It doesn't even taste good. It tastes like sludgy sugary coldness with sprinkles of coffee that isn't even good coffee.
~Its made by a machine. That's all.
~It has whipped cream. My homemade whipped cream is better. The caramel sauce isn't bad though.
~It makes my breath stink
~Makes me need to pee
~Upsets my stomach
~Makes me sleepy (on the other hand, it also calms me down)
~Has the fat/sugar of a big mac (according to a co-worker)
"8. McDonald’s: McCafé Caramel Frappe (22 ounces)
Read more at http://www.dietsinreview.com/diet_column/09/12-shockingly-unhealthy-coffee-drinks/#FCXhtyQbOl2VjIGm.99 "
I actually do recommend reading more at that link. It's shocking, to put it plainly. Think about it: That's just number EIGHT on the 'unhealthy coffee' list.
Ok, I'm done! Teehee?
~It causes the top of my mouth to hurt, and be sensitive and get hard (just plain painful)
~Its expensive
~It doesn't even taste good. It tastes like sludgy sugary coldness with sprinkles of coffee that isn't even good coffee.
~Its made by a machine. That's all.
~It has whipped cream. My homemade whipped cream is better. The caramel sauce isn't bad though.
~It makes my breath stink
~Makes me need to pee
~Upsets my stomach
~Makes me sleepy (on the other hand, it also calms me down)
~Has the fat/sugar of a big mac (according to a co-worker)
"8. McDonald’s: McCafé Caramel Frappe (22 ounces)
Calories: 680
Saturated Fat (g): 18
Carb (g): 94
Sugar (g): 88
Saturated Fat (g): 18
Carb (g): 94
Sugar (g): 88
For this calorie total, you could have had a cheeseburger, small french fries and a Fruit n’ Yogurt Parfait.
Read more at http://www.dietsinreview.com/diet_column/09/12-shockingly-unhealthy-coffee-drinks/#FCXhtyQbOl2VjIGm.99 "
I actually do recommend reading more at that link. It's shocking, to put it plainly. Think about it: That's just number EIGHT on the 'unhealthy coffee' list.
Ok, I'm done! Teehee?
Monday, February 2, 2015
I got mad
So.... Today was going really, really well. My first client was a suuuper chatty woman, but also very sweet and kind. Then my next client was a hairdresser that needed a lot of work, so I was happy to spend the time on her, and wished we'd had more. And my final client was nice, and wanted to lay for a few minutes.
Then the reception manager came in, and when she saw me, she said she needed me to come see her in a few minutes. My stomach dropped. I didn't understand why she would need to see me, since I hadn't done anything 'wrong'.
Turns out that a 'super important potential client' that I worked on on Saturday was very unhappy with the massage. I'll get the list of what she found wrong tomorrow, as well as a written warning so the next time we have a client that dislikes my service, I'll be out.
I'll be honest here. I'm COMPLETELY baffled. I did a good job, and gave her extra time, and did my best. The only complaint she had that I felt could have a basis was that I 'seemed tired'. I think that was the day I'd been woken up five times before my alarm went off, so it's entirely possible that I was tired, but that doesn't mean my massage was BAD and worth complaining about for THIRTY minutes. She said my chair was great, but my facial needed work, and that I didn't give her the full time on her Thai. That is NOT true. I even gave her extra time on her Thai.
After the shock of this, came the anger. I had just finally gotten over the last shock and upset that my last reprimand gave me.
It took weeks for me to stop having panic attacks every time I worked on a client thinking 'Will this be the one? Is this the last client for me?' It took even longer for me to stop feeling like I needed to cry during every massage.
Frankly, I don't want to deal with the pain of it again. I think it's ridiculous that I've worked on over 1,000 people, and had maybe 10 complaints. Yet those ten are close to getting me fired, and I will always question myself, my massage, and my clients because I'm never sure when the axe will fall. I could understand if it's an overwhelming majority saying there's something wrong with me, but I still send home a good number of happy clients every week. The only person working as much as I am is the Massage Manager (or Lead Therapist, whateves).
So, while I'm not sure if I'm going to outright quit, I *am* certainly going to start looking around, and it looks like a good number of places are hiring right now. I'd like to give 2 weeks notice, because we're all very aware that we're understaffed, and I don't want to leave them in the lurch. On the other hand, I feel that if they didn't need me, they would happy cut me loose to retain another client, and it's rather cutthroat. Hubby's been saying that my company is cutthroat for a while now, and he doesn't have a good opinion of it (I don't want to put words in his mouth, so sweetie, feel free to write your thoughts on my company down as a comment, or I can add it here later), but I never fully agreed. I'm starting to though.
So basically: I'm on my second reprimand, I'm pissed, and I'll likely be finding another job soon. It's not going to be easy finding one that fits our schedule as well as this one does, but we'll manage.
Then the reception manager came in, and when she saw me, she said she needed me to come see her in a few minutes. My stomach dropped. I didn't understand why she would need to see me, since I hadn't done anything 'wrong'.
Turns out that a 'super important potential client' that I worked on on Saturday was very unhappy with the massage. I'll get the list of what she found wrong tomorrow, as well as a written warning so the next time we have a client that dislikes my service, I'll be out.
I'll be honest here. I'm COMPLETELY baffled. I did a good job, and gave her extra time, and did my best. The only complaint she had that I felt could have a basis was that I 'seemed tired'. I think that was the day I'd been woken up five times before my alarm went off, so it's entirely possible that I was tired, but that doesn't mean my massage was BAD and worth complaining about for THIRTY minutes. She said my chair was great, but my facial needed work, and that I didn't give her the full time on her Thai. That is NOT true. I even gave her extra time on her Thai.
After the shock of this, came the anger. I had just finally gotten over the last shock and upset that my last reprimand gave me.
It took weeks for me to stop having panic attacks every time I worked on a client thinking 'Will this be the one? Is this the last client for me?' It took even longer for me to stop feeling like I needed to cry during every massage.
Frankly, I don't want to deal with the pain of it again. I think it's ridiculous that I've worked on over 1,000 people, and had maybe 10 complaints. Yet those ten are close to getting me fired, and I will always question myself, my massage, and my clients because I'm never sure when the axe will fall. I could understand if it's an overwhelming majority saying there's something wrong with me, but I still send home a good number of happy clients every week. The only person working as much as I am is the Massage Manager (or Lead Therapist, whateves).
So, while I'm not sure if I'm going to outright quit, I *am* certainly going to start looking around, and it looks like a good number of places are hiring right now. I'd like to give 2 weeks notice, because we're all very aware that we're understaffed, and I don't want to leave them in the lurch. On the other hand, I feel that if they didn't need me, they would happy cut me loose to retain another client, and it's rather cutthroat. Hubby's been saying that my company is cutthroat for a while now, and he doesn't have a good opinion of it (I don't want to put words in his mouth, so sweetie, feel free to write your thoughts on my company down as a comment, or I can add it here later), but I never fully agreed. I'm starting to though.
So basically: I'm on my second reprimand, I'm pissed, and I'll likely be finding another job soon. It's not going to be easy finding one that fits our schedule as well as this one does, but we'll manage.
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Lonely-, oh- so lone-ly, I have nobo-dy, to comment on my blog!!!
Yes, I made that fit our traditional 'lonely' song that one of us sings when we're feeling left out. Does anyone else have a signal like that? It's humorous, but it's also a serious 'I'm feeling less loved right now' signal and we can sing it, text it, or even just say it. The other is usually quite fast to respond to it, assuring both of their feelings and making the situation better.
Anyway, today was interesting. Hubby and I accidentally fell asleep last night when we decided to cuddle. So we were up and awake by 8 a.m., and though I've gotten super sleepy, I managed not to nap (so I'm really feeling the tiredness now). We had some fun times before he left for work, and I held down the fort. He called a middle school he really wants to enroll MJ into, and we set up an appointment to tour it this Friday on our mutual day off. Once that appointment was confirmed, I tried to make one at the local public school as well, and ended up having to sign up for one on February 13th, because they're too busy to accommodate private tours right now. I don't look on that as a good sign, to be honest. Reilly fed me the same crap last year when I tried to get one, and we both hate her current school.
Umm, what else. I read for a while, and got hungry ridiculously often (like I'm still hungry now, and just ate 2-3 hours ago) but tried not to eat too much. I made cookies for my cookie monster last night, and put them away (into a tin container) today so they'd be out of the way and hopefully stay fresh.
When MJ was supposed to be home on the bus, I walked out to greet her, and turn in a wedding band we found on the tennis court a few nights ago. They seemed impressed that we bothered turning that in. I just figured it was the right thing to do. I greeted our child, who was already in a good mood, and made a new friend that moved into the apartment complex this past week and we went inside after I picked up the mail.
Walking back, I looked through the mail and noticed a package slip, so I handed the mail off to MJ (she needed the restroom) and went back to the office to pick it up. I'm pretty sure it's a birthday gift from Hubby's parents, but I'm not opening it (though of course I'm dying to).
When I came back, Mj did all her homework, and mostly behaved though she balked at my topic choices for her punishment essays. We compromised (because I didn't care) and she listened to music while she wrote. She wanted to play in the hot tub, so she excitedly did her chores and helped with laundry and was allowed to play while I worked in the kitchen.
It took a surprising 40 minutes to clean the kitchen up enough for me to cook, and it was then that I discovered how low our food supplies were running. I need to go shopping to stock back up, but I'm a little tired of our standard meals and want something different, so I'm not sure what to buy.
Once I cleaned the kitchen, I walked out to call MJ to help me change the laundry over, and I noticed she was carrying her glasses rather than wearing them. We changed the laundry, came back home, and as I was coming in the door, I noticed she was pretty far behind me. I knew the cat was feeling antsy, so I swung the door lightly to close it while she took her time. I had a horrible premonition and jumped out of the way right as the door BANGED open and I could actually feel the wind pass my ankle by inches. If I hadn't moved, I could have bruised (at least) or broken (acutely possible with the strength she used) my leg. I won't lie, I was angry and scared, and I yelled. I yelled her full name, asked what she thought she was doing, and told her to get in the shower. Her excuse was that she thought I would lock her out, and that I was telling her to hurry up when I started shutting the door. I wasn't amused by her dramatic twist of a simple closing door, and pointed her to the shower.
I could hear her starting to sob as she went into her room (I'd scared her when I yelled because I so rarely yell), and felt a little bad but I was still mostly frightened by my close call. That child has some frightening strength!! I knew her intention wasn't to hurt me, and she had only thought of it as a game until I yelled, so when she sobbed out how sorry she was, I told her to come here.
She came to the kitchen where I was getting to work on dinner, and I explained that she scared me. She interrupted me and said I was angry. I admitted I was angry and scared that she had pushed the door so hard and so close to me. I further painted the picture: If she'd broken my leg, I wouldn't have been able to work, and we'd likely not be able to afford to stay in our apartment. I didn't have the car today, so I also wouldn't have been able to see a doctor, and it was a frightening thing to feel the door pass you within inches. She cried and cried and said she was sorry, and I made her look at me and told her bluntly that she needs to THINK about her actions before she does them. Then I hugged her, told her I wasn't mad, and I was sorry I yelled, but that I really needed her to think about what she does. She admitted that she thought she'd worked herself up too much and was having trouble breathing.
I pulled her into a hug, stroked her head and back and told to take a deep breath in, then out, and demonstrated for her. When I felt her breaths slowing, I asked 'Is that better?' and of course our drama-child said 'No.' *Rolls eyes* I said it would get better, please get in the shower. Right before she gets in, she's like 'I can't find my glasses! I think I left them at the pool, can I go get them?' and I was like 'I saw them earlier, they're not in the pool, did you leave them in the laundry room? Check your room, maybe you just set them down and forgot.' She 'checked' her room and couldn't find them, so I gave her my keys, pointed out the laundry room key, and sent her off by herself to check for them while I worked on dinner. She came back rather quickly and was excitedly calling for me.
She said she saw a shadow of a man raise a gun to a woman, and the woman asked him "Why?" and then she ran back as fast as she could. I was rather certain there was a rational explanation (rehearsing a play perhaps?), but decided it could be serious, and grabbed my phone and keys and asked her to show me. She almost cried when I asked her to go back out there, but she went, and then said she couldn't remember what windows it was. I shrugged and went to check the laundry room a second time for her glasses after remarking that we didn't hear a gunshot, so it was probably nothing.
When we returned, I was getting worried about the glasses, so I checked the room myself and found them. The brat didn't even look where Hubby always sets them when she goes to bed (apparently she's adopted that spot too), so the glasses mystery was solved. When she was getting in the shower, she suddenly called out for me, asking if I was alright. Apparently she heard a loud bang. *sigh* I called back 'Calm the hell down and take your shower!!' and she got in.
It took me a while to make dinner because of all the interruptions, but it worked out eventually. While we ate, we watched the beginning of the Sabrina the Teenage Witch movie, before I stopped it 20-30 minutes in, and told her that was enough, she needed to brush her teeth and get into bed. I finished up making her lunch while she did that, before I remembered that we needed to pick up the laundry. I told her to come with me, and she complained, asking why I could just wait til Hubby came home and do it with him. I reminded her that it was her chore, and she stopped. We went to pick them all up, but one of the dryers wasn't dry AT ALL. So I sent her back for quarters, and she was nervous.
She came sprinting back with the quarters, and babbling about how a couple scared her coming around a corner and I just sighed. I knew she was wound up with her imagination again and basically told her to not sprint around corners. We ran that one again, and picked up the other two loads and when we walked in the door, Hubby surprised us. Apparently he was a little freaked to come home to an empty house.
MJ immediately grabbed him to put her to bed (she likes how he does it), and as she settled in, I could finally settle down.
Now it's late, I'm hungry AGAIN, and we still have to pick up that last load of laundry. Lovely evening..... Love you all, goodnight!
Anyway, today was interesting. Hubby and I accidentally fell asleep last night when we decided to cuddle. So we were up and awake by 8 a.m., and though I've gotten super sleepy, I managed not to nap (so I'm really feeling the tiredness now). We had some fun times before he left for work, and I held down the fort. He called a middle school he really wants to enroll MJ into, and we set up an appointment to tour it this Friday on our mutual day off. Once that appointment was confirmed, I tried to make one at the local public school as well, and ended up having to sign up for one on February 13th, because they're too busy to accommodate private tours right now. I don't look on that as a good sign, to be honest. Reilly fed me the same crap last year when I tried to get one, and we both hate her current school.
Umm, what else. I read for a while, and got hungry ridiculously often (like I'm still hungry now, and just ate 2-3 hours ago) but tried not to eat too much. I made cookies for my cookie monster last night, and put them away (into a tin container) today so they'd be out of the way and hopefully stay fresh.
When MJ was supposed to be home on the bus, I walked out to greet her, and turn in a wedding band we found on the tennis court a few nights ago. They seemed impressed that we bothered turning that in. I just figured it was the right thing to do. I greeted our child, who was already in a good mood, and made a new friend that moved into the apartment complex this past week and we went inside after I picked up the mail.
Walking back, I looked through the mail and noticed a package slip, so I handed the mail off to MJ (she needed the restroom) and went back to the office to pick it up. I'm pretty sure it's a birthday gift from Hubby's parents, but I'm not opening it (though of course I'm dying to).
When I came back, Mj did all her homework, and mostly behaved though she balked at my topic choices for her punishment essays. We compromised (because I didn't care) and she listened to music while she wrote. She wanted to play in the hot tub, so she excitedly did her chores and helped with laundry and was allowed to play while I worked in the kitchen.
It took a surprising 40 minutes to clean the kitchen up enough for me to cook, and it was then that I discovered how low our food supplies were running. I need to go shopping to stock back up, but I'm a little tired of our standard meals and want something different, so I'm not sure what to buy.
Once I cleaned the kitchen, I walked out to call MJ to help me change the laundry over, and I noticed she was carrying her glasses rather than wearing them. We changed the laundry, came back home, and as I was coming in the door, I noticed she was pretty far behind me. I knew the cat was feeling antsy, so I swung the door lightly to close it while she took her time. I had a horrible premonition and jumped out of the way right as the door BANGED open and I could actually feel the wind pass my ankle by inches. If I hadn't moved, I could have bruised (at least) or broken (acutely possible with the strength she used) my leg. I won't lie, I was angry and scared, and I yelled. I yelled her full name, asked what she thought she was doing, and told her to get in the shower. Her excuse was that she thought I would lock her out, and that I was telling her to hurry up when I started shutting the door. I wasn't amused by her dramatic twist of a simple closing door, and pointed her to the shower.
I could hear her starting to sob as she went into her room (I'd scared her when I yelled because I so rarely yell), and felt a little bad but I was still mostly frightened by my close call. That child has some frightening strength!! I knew her intention wasn't to hurt me, and she had only thought of it as a game until I yelled, so when she sobbed out how sorry she was, I told her to come here.
She came to the kitchen where I was getting to work on dinner, and I explained that she scared me. She interrupted me and said I was angry. I admitted I was angry and scared that she had pushed the door so hard and so close to me. I further painted the picture: If she'd broken my leg, I wouldn't have been able to work, and we'd likely not be able to afford to stay in our apartment. I didn't have the car today, so I also wouldn't have been able to see a doctor, and it was a frightening thing to feel the door pass you within inches. She cried and cried and said she was sorry, and I made her look at me and told her bluntly that she needs to THINK about her actions before she does them. Then I hugged her, told her I wasn't mad, and I was sorry I yelled, but that I really needed her to think about what she does. She admitted that she thought she'd worked herself up too much and was having trouble breathing.
I pulled her into a hug, stroked her head and back and told to take a deep breath in, then out, and demonstrated for her. When I felt her breaths slowing, I asked 'Is that better?' and of course our drama-child said 'No.' *Rolls eyes* I said it would get better, please get in the shower. Right before she gets in, she's like 'I can't find my glasses! I think I left them at the pool, can I go get them?' and I was like 'I saw them earlier, they're not in the pool, did you leave them in the laundry room? Check your room, maybe you just set them down and forgot.' She 'checked' her room and couldn't find them, so I gave her my keys, pointed out the laundry room key, and sent her off by herself to check for them while I worked on dinner. She came back rather quickly and was excitedly calling for me.
She said she saw a shadow of a man raise a gun to a woman, and the woman asked him "Why?" and then she ran back as fast as she could. I was rather certain there was a rational explanation (rehearsing a play perhaps?), but decided it could be serious, and grabbed my phone and keys and asked her to show me. She almost cried when I asked her to go back out there, but she went, and then said she couldn't remember what windows it was. I shrugged and went to check the laundry room a second time for her glasses after remarking that we didn't hear a gunshot, so it was probably nothing.
When we returned, I was getting worried about the glasses, so I checked the room myself and found them. The brat didn't even look where Hubby always sets them when she goes to bed (apparently she's adopted that spot too), so the glasses mystery was solved. When she was getting in the shower, she suddenly called out for me, asking if I was alright. Apparently she heard a loud bang. *sigh* I called back 'Calm the hell down and take your shower!!' and she got in.
It took me a while to make dinner because of all the interruptions, but it worked out eventually. While we ate, we watched the beginning of the Sabrina the Teenage Witch movie, before I stopped it 20-30 minutes in, and told her that was enough, she needed to brush her teeth and get into bed. I finished up making her lunch while she did that, before I remembered that we needed to pick up the laundry. I told her to come with me, and she complained, asking why I could just wait til Hubby came home and do it with him. I reminded her that it was her chore, and she stopped. We went to pick them all up, but one of the dryers wasn't dry AT ALL. So I sent her back for quarters, and she was nervous.
She came sprinting back with the quarters, and babbling about how a couple scared her coming around a corner and I just sighed. I knew she was wound up with her imagination again and basically told her to not sprint around corners. We ran that one again, and picked up the other two loads and when we walked in the door, Hubby surprised us. Apparently he was a little freaked to come home to an empty house.
MJ immediately grabbed him to put her to bed (she likes how he does it), and as she settled in, I could finally settle down.
Now it's late, I'm hungry AGAIN, and we still have to pick up that last load of laundry. Lovely evening..... Love you all, goodnight!
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