Phew, I have some catching up to do.

pineapples: Yay for an awesome weekend with A~! Good job on getting caught back up. Everyone slips from their comfortable place in the homework period at some point or another, so I fully understand. ^_^ You're withdrawing your application for the Japan program? WHHHYYYYY? ;__;

Rozfire: Sorry about the drama fest. I might've added to it a bit, so I'm sorry. (lxl) <=that's a face. I understand completely. My senior year, I cut people off rather than deal with drama. It's a suggestion. It worked well for me, but I was honestly completely fed up with it. If you can find a different way, that'd prolly be better. Just remember: I will ALWAYS be behind you. ^_^ Love you girlie. And thanks for the support. ^_^

So, I'm sure everyone is dying to know how things went with Mr. Swindler. (Ri-ight) ^_^ Well, in the interest of keeping it simple, we met, he got all of my information, I looked at the car and things went downhill from there. I tried to reason with him, but he was pretty bitchy. When I hunched down to take a few better pictures, he blocked my sun and distracted me. When I asked for more estimates, I said that it wasn't his responsibility to get more, and if I insisted on them, he would add other damage from the car to it (paint scratches on the stepping thing). He started to run his hand along the car door and asked in a sly voice if my car had done that damage too. I looked at him blankly and said "My car isn't even that tall." He looked kinda shocked for a second and then was like, "Oh, yeah, you're right, it isn't." When he finally made some comment along the lines of "You can pay us a check for 900 dollars, or else I can go to the insurance about it. You CANT use your insurance, right?" I lost it a bit and snapped at him. "I CAN use my insurance, I just didn't want to. Let me call my mom." So I called her up, told her "I'd kinda like to let insurance handle this." and somehow she understood that I was pissed, being threatened, and didn't want to lose my temper. She told me that it would be fine, to do it through insurance, that I would be paying, etc. It was all agreeable to me, so I told him we would do the insurance claim. We exchanged insurance, but he had the wrong card for some reason. So I let his company contact mine, and we went from there. I pay a 250 deductible and both our cars get fixed. I now have enough money for that at least. I wasn't writing any assholes checks for 900. I'm just glad I didn't lose my temper. I do NOT like to be threatened.

SO! Anyways! After that, life got better. I'm getting pretty average grades right now. My checks would be looking pretty nice if I didn't have days off because of holidays coming up. My mom asked if I was coming home for the holidays. I could find other places to be, but being home during holidays seems like the best place to be. I'll regret saying that soon, I just know it. I have a headache right now....It's probably from lack of sleep, but I have a meeting with someone about Study Abroad at 10, I'm taking my car in to be estimated at 11, and I'm just honestly very tired....I'm not sure about seeing bf today. I'm so tired, but I want time with him. But it wouldn't be fair to him, I suppose. *sigh* RB keeps staying out every night. And when she doesn't stay out, her bf stays at our place with her. It's driving me crazy. I worried I'll slip up and show my real meanness. I mean, people can think that I'm being mean, but they haven't seen mean from me until I've been completely free from caring. Me tired and worn down and frustrated do NOT help me keep from lashing out. *hangs head* I don't want to lash out at her, I don't want to lash out at anyone. After I lash out, either she'll lash back, or she'll be so hurt that our relationship can't really be repaired. If she lashes back, depending on how good of a lash it is, I'll retaliate or just plain laugh at her. Neither thing is good. But it's my nature to not let anyone know if they've hurt me and make sure that I (can) hurt them more. >____< I don't WANNNA FIIIIGHT!!!! I just want her to fucking stop pretending that she doesn't have to be a college student! Take care of your studies damnit! He's not even completely divorced yet! Quit looking at his kids on Facebook and talking about them like you'll definitely be there long-term! Don't TEXT HIM CONSTANTLY! Get SLEEP! Take CARE of yourself! Don't revolve your world around him!

Auuugh, I sound like I'm jealous, but that's not it. I don't have that right. I just worry. She's sinking too fast, and even if he is as well, it'll be disastrous if they don't slow down and chill out. I don't want her to sit on the ground crying and saying "I just love him so much" after he made her come get her stuff, EVER AGAIN! Slow down, be romantic, get your asses out of each other's beds, especially when you're exhausted, and please, please, please, take better care..... Sorry, I think I needed to get that out.

On an EVEN BETTER NOTE! I submitted my IDS proposal because this was the LAST POSSIBLE time I could without majorly changing my proposal. My Psych Head Advisor told me, and I had less than 24 hours to scramble everything together in perfectly logical sequence. But I DID IT! I got it submitted in time. (5 minutes to spare even!) I got my advisor to sign off on it (30 minutes before it was due). And! AND! Last night I got an email saying from my advisor (who's on the committee) saying that my proposal passed the committee! That I might need to resubmit it typed up (three or four pages of it was handwritten) but she would contact me about that.

ALSO! I found a scholarship that could REALLY HELP my study abroad expenses. I'm so excited and scared all at the same time. (>.<) ^_^ Heehee. OH! Pineapples! There's this conference you might be interested in. Go here: http://jasc62.blogspot.com/ for more info in it. I'm wondering as to my eligibility for it, but I really wanna do it. It'd be amazing if we could meet up there, wouldn't it? I love ya'll. I'm gonna go do my job now, as soon as I find a new background. ^.^

You can disregard the first 20 seconds of it: