KomattaKoto

Which translates roughly to "Troublesome things".

*sigh* I have something to admit. I hate to admit it, and I hate to think of anyone knowing, but .....*dundundun* I'm out of money. I can say I'm 'running low' but that translates to "I've been eating 1 dollar's worth of food each day for lunch in order to still have something to buy food with the next day. I have less than a hundred yen to my name that belongs to me here. I had to borrow money from Ikuchin just to buy a ticket for the train ride home.

See, I thought I would be paid tonight but I wasn't. So I am in some real trouble. I must pay Ikuchin back. And then there's the bank's fee which I was never aware of until I received an email about it when I got here, and a few other 'bills' waiting to be paid. Beyond that, I'm on my own for lunch every day, so it's really troublesome. I'm attempting to find scholarships, grants, jobs, or anything I can do to bring in the money, but I'm not certain what is available. If you know of anything I can do, or where I could go, I'd be extremely happy to hear it. My parents aren't an option.

Beyond that, I'm super tired, and on the verge of making myself sick from the worry. There was this sick moment when I realized tonight that I wasn't being paid tonight, and that I didn't even have the 210 yen necessary to buy a ticket home. (BTW, 1 yen roughly translates to 1 cent) My stomach kind of curdled and I felt like I might throw up if I opened my mouth too much. I refuse to cry, because that won't help anything. Instead, I'm going to look at my options, and figure out what I can do. Any suggestions are appreciated.

*sigh* My class really isn't hard at all....it's just alot of work....I get about 3-6 pages of homework a day. I can do all of that homework within 45-60 minutes, depending on the content. I would say within half an hour, but kanji is infinitely more difficult, so I can't make that claim. I think I'm gonna take a shower and try to relax. Stress makes me so ill, and I really can't afford to be sick right now either. I'm rather mortified that people are going to know I'm broke, so please don't rub it in if you can help it. When I have to admit it to my mom, I can already hear the "See? What was that 'I can make it on my own' talk about? Come home! That's the only money I'll give you!" or something of that nature. How depressing. There's the slight chance she'd react with "My poor baby. We'll send you money, but make a budget, and we'll work something out when you come home next year" but honestly? That's like a 3% chance. So depressing. AUGH! No more depression! I really wanna talk to bf though!!! He's never online when I'm bursting to consult him....whether I'm in America or Japan. ARGH! That's depressing too! That's it! Shower time! Then I'll blog about my week in more political ways on the other blog. :P

.......I lied. I didn't post this before my shower because I couldn't find a good song. After more that ten different videos, I've decided on this one. *sigh* It sounds like an apology, but it's just a soft song. G'night.